Do you have a child who struggles with self-confidence? If so, don’t worry! There are things that you can do to help them feel better about themselves. In this blog post, we’re going to talk about three easy ways that will help boost your kid’s confidence and get them feeling more positive about themselves again.
The Carry-Over Principle: Encourage a child’s talent and confidence will carry over into other activities.
When you encourage a child to do what they enjoy, their self-esteem can experience a valuable boost. It may not be intuitive, but when you encourage your child’s favorite activities, especially ones they enjoy doing, your child is more likely to feel confident even in less inspiring situations. The Carry-Over Principle is a way of developing a positive self-image in children.
If you have a child that loves to sing, for example, take them to their choir class and watch how good they feel after. They may struggle to put on a happy face at school because their teacher is tough on them. But if you remind your child of how great they sounded singing yesterday, it can help ease the disappointment of not doing so well in class that day.
The trick with the Carry-Over Principle is to make a habit of substantiating your child’s talent and accomplishments. You could ask family and friends to call or send messages recognizing your child’s forte or reward them by giving awards and trophies like a plaque or a glass award and display them in your house. This is a great way for kids to feel good about their accomplishments, and they can serve as a reminder later in life if your kid needs inspiration.
Address and Improve Your Own Self-Image
It might sound like common sense, but you have to consider how your own feelings of self-worth will affect how you speak about yourself. If you’re constantly slamming your abilities and talents, it can’t help but impact the way your child views themselves.
Even the most successful and stable people in the world have self-esteem issues. So if you take a measured look into your own self-confidence, it will benefit you, as well as your child.
The good news is that parenting is a wonderful time to investigate and improve your own self-image by exploring your family history and breaking any negative patterns. You can become a more confident person and experience that confidence with your child. Moreover, you can watch how it positively affects them, too.
The Three-Second Rule: Catch and correct negative self-talk immediately
You’ve likely heard the phrase, “catch them doing something right,” but this is different. If you catch yourself criticizing or tearing down your child’s ability, try using The Three Second Rule (or the Three-Second Glance) to correct that negative self-talk.
The idea is pretty simple: if you catch yourself saying something unhelpful, stop for three seconds and think of a positive thing your child has done recently. Then say it out loud or write down what you thought about so they know how much you appreciate them.
The Three-Second Rule is also a great way to keep your self-image in check. This way, you will have an opportunity to catch yourself before you go off on unhelpful tangents. Training your brain to think positively will only benefit how you feel about yourself and the positive messages you share with your child.
Final Piece of Advice: Relax
Unless the problem is clinical, you should not over-worry about your child’s self-esteem. Self-confidence is not something you give your child the same way you provide them with food or medicine. It’s something you help grow in them by doing your best, with yourself and your child.
Do your best to focus on the positive and remove yourself from any negative self-talk. Use The Carry-Over Principle often by complimenting your child for their talents and encouraging their interests. And make sure you’re taking care of yourself and being a positive role model for your child. If you can do these things, it will help build your child’s self-esteem.